I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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