She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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