I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Randomize
