He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
