3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize