Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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