I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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