Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
