just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Randomize
