I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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