brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
White coat. Heels.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
