I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
