hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
...so i touched it.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
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