Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?

  (904): View more from Florida

  Both

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): What are you talking about? And how drunk are you? (904): Both http://tfl.nu/7q6w
  Replies (18) Good night (6265) Bad night (782)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me. http://tfl.nu/rmif
  Replies (15) Good night (2608) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself http://tfl.nu/0tce
  Replies (6) Good night (639) Bad night (2783)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued. http://tfl.nu/5cyo
  Replies (16) Good night (3881) Bad night (840)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it. http://tfl.nu/xnwu
  Replies (10) Good night (1109) Bad night (4499)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm full of awesome ideas

  (972): View more from Texas

  Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): I'm full of awesome ideas (972): Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs... http://tfl.nu/g4si
  Replies (20) Good night (4579) Bad night (1237)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay. http://tfl.nu/nx25
  Replies (35) Good night (6225) Bad night (1160)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store http://tfl.nu/jpa2
  Replies (19) Good night (5226) Bad night (1058)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy http://tfl.nu/w9ds
  Replies (3) Good night (3110) Bad night (1001)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened. http://tfl.nu/z3yw
  Replies (3) Good night (3059) Bad night (752)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking. http://tfl.nu/yxdj
  Replies (5) Good night (1579) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am? http://tfl.nu/gml1
  Replies (5) Good night (1044) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could. http://tfl.nu/ywgy
  Replies (5) Good night (943) Bad night (522)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  Fuck him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred. (606): Fuck him. http://tfl.nu/h9q7
  Replies (2) Good night (1378) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling. http://tfl.nu/owmt
  Replies (13) Good night (602) Bad night (316)

Randomize