it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
