As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
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