she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize