I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
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I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
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I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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