I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
You dont lie about slip and slides
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
