I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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