Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I just gift wrapped bread.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
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