that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
