I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize