Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
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Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
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GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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