i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
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Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
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I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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