I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Everclear isn't food dammit
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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