new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
