i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
