I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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