I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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