Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
