What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
