ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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