we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I just want nice things and good sex
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
