Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
