you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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