Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize