If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
