my being single is dangerous.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
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