Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize