I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
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Operation Purity has been aborted
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
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I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for