She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize