We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
