why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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