were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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