you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
