so explain again why im purple
no
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
