Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
