Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
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They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
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Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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