I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
